The Pattern

Dear Heavenly Father,

Last time we spoke, I mentioned a pattern in our prayers. I didn’t see it until the morning of my hike. But what I have intuitively and organically followed are the seven steps to healing. One, awareness. Two, truth. Three, love. Four, consecration. Five, sacrifice.

When I saw the pattern, I realized the next step is forgiveness, for self and others, then completion.

The first time I took these steps, the result was my written book, Restoring Virtue. The book is my testimony of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and how, through His enabling power, my broken heart was healed. The second time I took these steps, the result was my recorded podcast by the same name. The podcast facilitated me finding my voice and using it with confidence to share the true gospel of Jesus Christ. This time, other than these written prayers, I don’t know the result. I’m at the edge of a precipice, reaching out to touch heaven. If I tip into the blue, will you catch me?

Father, I do know that forgiveness is the hardest step. So, while I am excited and anticipatory for the result, I am also nervous about my ability to show up with courage. I ask that you be present as I prepare for what the heavens have to offer.

Forgiveness is the hardest step because it requires replacing the story of me with the story of thee. It means sacrificing false identities such as victim, oppressed, powerless, for the divine. And isn’t that what our communion has been about? What it means to be a woman in your eyes.

As far as the story of the historical masculine rule over the feminine, do we not all play a part in the same drama? Are we, as children, not all subject to the flesh, to the chains we are bound, to the false traditions we have lived? Can blame and suffering not be soothed with compassion for the masculine and love for the feminine? Can a new story be told?

Last Friday evening, I stepped outside to see a lunar halo encircling the moon. I’d never seen anything like it in my 44 years of life. The only word to describe this heavenly phenomenon was awe. That feeling mixed with reverence had a powerful effect on my mind, body, and soul. I felt bathed in the glow.

As I seek my own forgiveness and contemplate those I must forgive, I ask that the Holy Spirit wash over and encircle your daughters with Her heavenly glow. That your daughters’ hearts and voices be cleansed.

In humility, I shall not waver.

Your Daughter Sincerely,

Emily

Amen.

The Butte with Pioneer Peak behind it and the moon with a lunar halo. (unfiltered)